closethefridge

Wed, 21 Jul 2004 15:49:42 GMT

One day while I was walking along the street I saw a hobo, and he said "Smile, it's the law." I did not give him any money. But then out of nowhere, a crispy duck head fell from the sky and onto the pavement. I stopped and looked at it for a minute. It was missing an eye...and a body. I suddenly felt hungry and so I decided to get a bite to eat. After eating I walked out side and someone yelled "You didn't say thank you!" at me. I was confused and so I made a confused face like O_o? The guy said, "I held the door open for you and you didn't say thank you!" I think he wanted a tip. Then as I was driving home I saw a sign that said "No shooting in sharon" which I thought was a good idea. Shooting should be illegal in all parts of the state. My job should be to make laws. I'm also good at being harrased by squirrels in the park while eating a raisin role apparantly. True story.

Sun, 18 Jul 2004 18:21:44 GMT

I'M IN BOSTON!...and oh man, is it great. I've only been here for three hours so far and I'm already having the best time. I went food shopping with my aunt and the lady at the cash register had some kind of mental problem and totally felt up all our food before chucking it down the little conveyor belt. I felt bad for the bread. Then later on today we're going to go swimming and then to a japanese restaurant for dinner! yay! I'm still trying to decide whether to totally just forget about my diet all week so that I can eat chinese food from china town everyday (along with their AWESOME pastries) or if I wanna just eat there one day. I'm going to the japanese supermarket too where i will buy a crapload of junkfood and enough milk tea to make it until next summer, and also the chibi anime toy store in cambridge. Oh man, I'm totally spending all $225 my mom let me take out of the bank....on anime stuff and japanese food (I can't wait to buy stufffffff)And I also want to get a chinese tea set thingie from china town....oh oh!! I also have air conditioning! Unlike at my house where all I have is that crap fan...air conditioning. I'm so happy up here. This is totally where I'll be living when I grow up. Food.

Thu, 01 Jul 2004 17:23:15 GMT

I'm looking at legwarmers on this really awesome website that sells a crapload of different socks..and..legwarmers. I want them all. My grandma is driving up to our house tonight to visit until MONDAY...ugh. My step-dad is bringing my mom out somewhere this weekend for her birthday, and since my grandma's house is being worked on she's coming up to our house to watch us while they're gone. I plan on finding people to take me in this weekend. PLEASE HELP. I mean, it would be fine if my brother and sister weren't here, because my grandma likes to make me interact with them. And I'm just going to be stuck in this house all four or five days with them, because she doesn't know anywhere to take us around here. I think there's supposed to be thunderstorms tomorrow, both my controllers for gamecube are broken, I haven't gotten any new anime for awhile because of a severe lack of money (a.k.a I need a job), and my grandma gave me a sewing machine but I don't know how to use it -_- I think I'm going to go draw jess g a picture now.

Tue, 01 Jun 2004 12:33:43 GMT

This morning, this VERY morning, me and Aubrey went to talk to the God of all English teachers.../teachers in general, CANGE. Yup, we had to stand outside his room for about twenty minutes before we worked up enough courage to go in but, we were finally able to do it. We walked in and he looked like he was about to leave, but me being the jerk I am stopped him and said (while shaking and holding onto aubrey like I was about to fall from a ten story building) 'how old were you in 1970?' And that was the only question we had to ask him. He did all the talking from there...well...except for where we had to explain to him we wanted to interview him for a history project. But other than that, he did all the talking. He told us about he was in chicago where all the demonstrations were being held, and how his dad was a cop and he'd tell little cange stories about what was going on with the war, and about how he almost got drafted but by the time he had to go for his examinations and such the war was starting to die down so he was SAVED. And he lived on to become an english teacher. Oh, and he also told us about hippies. He has small pupils, and that is cool, because his eyes are huge. So yea, after we talked to him we thanked him and bowed, then ran out of the room, and I said something about us having to go sit down AND THEN HE WALKED RIGHT BY US. He had followed us out of the room and was probably listenting to us talking. So after he zoomed by us me and aubrey fell down onto the stairs and kinda slid down a couple, and aubrey hurt her back...and we laughed. Then we had to get up before he came back and saw us convulsing, so we ran the rest of the way down to the first floor, fell down again, and then laughed s'more. It was an awesome experience. I fell ten times smarter after just having listened to him talk. Did I mention the fact that he had REALLY SMALL PUPILS? Wow...aubrey, you and me are so brave.

Fri, 16 Apr 2004 19:23:31 GMT

Ok so...holy crap. I'm at my grandma's house IN VERNON, and well, she got this movie for my little sister to watch and I'm sure you've all heard of it and maybe even (jessica g) watched it, but it's called brother bear. And OH MY GOD that movie really pissed me off. I had to leave the room before it was really all the way through because I was just like..pff! This movie is crap! And I think my grandma started crying because she loved the movie, but anyway...the reason it pissed me off so bad. To start out with, in case you don't know about the movie, it's about this guy who has two brothers and one of them is killed by a bear and so the guy goes out to kill the bear as revenge and his other brother who's still alive is all..Noooo! but the guy goes anyway and kills the thing, then he gets turned into a bear (after he cries for awhile) by his dead brother's spirit (SPITE) and his still alive brother thinks the bear he was tunred into had really killed him..meaning..his brother EW This is confusing...but anyway, the guy who was tunred into a bear is trying to turn back into a man and he's gotta go someplace to have it done, and finds this little bear cub who's gonna help him get there. Then to make a long story short, the two bond (awww *puke puke puke*) and find the place where the guy can be turned back into a human, but before that happens he finds out the bear he killed to avenge his brother's death was his new little bear cub friend's mom! DUN DUN DUN (is this making sense?) and so the little bear cub cries..the guy who's a bear is almost killed by his brother but then saved by the little bear cub, is turned back into a human, and then decides he wants to be a bear again and that's where I left. Why would you want to be turned back INTO a bear? He's just gonna leave his REAL brother and go live with a bear cub because "he needs me" I don't even know...I just had to vent how bad I thought that movie was. And my grandma was dying of laughther because of the moose and..oh god. I felt like running into the woods and killing some bear..and..some..moose. I hate disney. the end.

I wanna leave for boston NOW

Thu, 08 Apr 2004 17:28:37 GMT

AH HA HA! I tricked you all! I didn't come to school today! It was probably a good day though, I was considering going because the classes were gonna be short, and then there was the play and so..it sounded like an easy day, but then I stayed up until two in the morning last night and when I woke up at six..I couldn't move. I really needed the sleep. I freakin slept through all the screaming and barking that usually wakes me up in the morning too..and I got up at ten thirty. I'm still not dressed, but I'm all packed up for boston. And danielle, I have the cheez-its next to my suitcase for me and my mom to eat on the long journey there. Did you end up staying home today too? I'm afraid to call your house for some reason to check. I'm pretty bored right now, and wondering if skipping school today was a good idea or not..Oh man. My step dad loved his cards that everyone made for him. My mom said he was so happy about it, and that he usually hates when people make a fuss over him, but that he was super happy about the cards. I felt like such a good daughter..or step daughter, except that I told aubrey he was 28 or 29..and it turns out he's thirty. I was like o.o SHOCKED. But yea, there's nothing left to do now except wait another two hours before I can leave. My mom hasn't even packed yet. I hate her. Not really, but I know we're going to fight this weekend, it always happens because of stupid reasons like..I want to eat at china town and she wants room service. She doesn't really like chinese food. but this is my weekend damit! this is my birthday present, when we go to boston for YOUR birthday, then we can eat shitty room service. My step dad gave me forty dollars yesterday for no reason. I was so happy, because besides the credit card he's never given me more than twenty. I think it was because he was in a good mood from the cards. Anyway..I hate tuna fish. That's all. Bye guys! I'll try to bring you all something back..that isn't anime related..making it cool for you..or something. See you all soon!

Thu, 08 Apr 2004 03:16:18 GMT

I decided the only way to post reguarly would be to post normal stuff. Except every time I try to do this it ends up being completely fake because..well it's just funner to go back and read it. Anyway, I'm going to boston tomorrow..all of you probably know that already, and I also decided I'm going to go to school tomorrow too. I just don't want to have to help out with the play because..I'm just lazy. I think my neck got fatter. There's really no point in staying home tomorrow either, well...except to sleep. Speaking of sleeping, what the crap jess g!? I call you today and you're taking a nap? I called danielle yesterday and she was too busy to talk to me too. What is wrong with you people? You may have important naps to take or have some awesome rash drugs to take..but I don't! I have my phone and Fuse! and today my step-dad told me we might not have fuse anymore and I cried! And that sandwich I made today really sucked! There was way too much cheese on it! I mean, I like orange cheese and all, but I guess two slices it just too much! *cries* I have to go..I think I need to sleep.

Mon, 29 Mar 2004 04:37:02 GMT

so today I was walking through my lemon farm with my friend jess smith, and we were looking for some nice lemons to make lemonade with, when suddenly god got mad at me for making fun of my mom ALOT for helping a child in the christian children's fund(which really happened..why can't my mom support me by handing over $20 a month to the, support the jobless children's fund?). He turned all the lemons in my lemon farm pink so that I couldn't make lemonade anymore. Too bad I'm not the only person in the world who grows lemonds god! LAME! anyway, I decided to spite god by making lemonade with my pink lemons anyway, and found that not only was it a nice pink color, but that it also tasted quite good. and so me and jess smith opened up a mighty fine business making what we cleverly named "pink lemonade", and selling it at a lemonade stand outside my house for .25 plus .2 cents, which made us a fortune..and I made god cry. ok...the end.

Fri, 19 Mar 2004 19:21:19 GMT

p.s. cute kitty bubble

Fri, 19 Mar 2004 19:17:53 GMT

A real entry? Why not. All this exciting stuff happens, and I'm stuck making stories about the mole king and jesse sway. Not that those aren't exciting things..but there are other things that need to be written about as well. For example, uh...well the mole king got his hair cut, and...no no no. I'm not writing about that. Well then, I'll just talk about how my day's been so far. I woke up around nine this morning, and my mom left for work, so I have to watch my little brother and sister until my step-dad gets home. So I've been sitting on the couch watching tv. I moved when it was time for lunch. I made myself a sandwhich..and I made my little sister...a sandwhich.o.O Man, this sucks. Sandwhiches are so boring..along with the rest of my day Alright..how about..I woke up this morning as usual, except for when I stepped out of bed I noticed that there was a huge hole in my floor! I peered down into it, and discovered that someone..or something had tunneled into my home! Well naturally I was pissed, because..well because this bum had gotten dirt all over what remained of my floor. I can't stand when my room is dirty. So I decided to jump down into the hole and beat up whoever had done this, but then I remembered that I was supposed to be watching my little sister. I decided on just taking her with me, because there was justice that needed some dishing out. So I went and got her along with a flashlight, then we both jumped in. We walked through the tunnel for what seemed like hours, until we heard something scratching around in front of us. I aimed the flashlight toward the noise, and discovered it was the newly shaven mole king! Well that made me double pissed. The mole king had tunneled into my home AND he got a shit ass looking hair cut! Then, well..to make a long story short I kicked his ass, and left him convulsing in the bottom of the tunnel. Then me and my sister walked home, and ate sandwhiches for lunch. THE END

Tue, 09 Mar 2004 17:26:06 GMT

Journal Aubrey wrote for me almost a year ago....

Aubrey Inman
English B
4/23/03

Today is Ashley Karr’s birthday. She is in my English class. She is only doing a five-word journal today. It is her birthday that is why. Ashley Karr is my friend. On Tuesdays, we walk to our worst class in the world…English!!

Our English teacher is evil! He goes by the name of Mr.Cangevil. Maybe you know him. Maybe you don’t that is sad.

The End.

Number of Words so that you don’t have to waste your precious English class time counting them. But now we have to add these few words that I have here. = 102.

Now it’s the end: (add these few words too.) now = 114

5/7/03

Today, I do not feel like writing a freakin journal to you because you suck, and my grade in English class went down by like 4 points. Therefore you do not deserve to get a journal from me. Nor Ashley Karr. I think her grade went down too…but I am not completely sure. So yeah.. Ashley Karr will not be doing a journal today. But I think that Katie McCuster and Corey OxyMoron wouldn’t mind making two extra journals..one for me, and one for Ashley karr! I hate you.

-sincerely your best student..not!

Wed, 03 Mar 2004 02:46:25 GMT

Talking to Corey Oxymoron. She denied my ring...just because I found it randomly laying next to the keyboard in the media center. She also said it didn't fit right on any of her fingers. So I had to propose to aubrey...except aubrey doesn't seem to appreciate the ring either. I think corey is trying to win me back. She invited me to join her and sam in a three way during history class. I had to decline though, mainly because aubrey was sitting right next to me. Danielle had invited me to join one with her and a pedofile before that, but I also had to decline because her and me weren't on speaking terms at the time. We're fine now though, as long as she makes me french toast for tomorrow. Anyway, back to corey and sam. They were bugging me all class period about this three way, and finally I just had to say, y'know I like you guys but not in that way. So me and sam made a heart and the matter was dropped. But for the rest of class her and corey kept making these sexual innuendo(sp?) Corey goes, sam you have anything to eat..and sam said, well...with a suggestive glance toward corey. I was like..oh my. I didn't get much work done that period because everyone around me was so talkative. So now I'm gonna have to stay up tonight to finish it. I hope I finish in time for family guy.
p.s. kiddos-this sounds really bad so I think I should clarify at least the three way thing..it meant three way calling..on the phone..without the xxx. This can't be any worse but I'm posting anyway because I typed it all.

Mon, 01 Mar 2004 19:12:11 GMT

I had to give the ring to corey so whosever ring it was didn't blame you for taking it...it was for your protection. *sniff sniff* I'm sorry. Excuse me. I have to go cry now because I think you're implying that I'm dumb.

Thu, 19 Feb 2004 00:34:08 GMT

Me and aubrey were walking down the hall one morning, taking field trips and visiting the mole king to pass the time, when out of no where, who should appear but Jesse Sway? He was with his evil manipulative mother Bo-Beefe, and you could see by the look in their eyes that they were cooking up some awful scheme to hurt us, because they're always whining about how mean we are to them. Anyway, Bo-Beefe has this power where she can posses you and make you do mean awful stuff to your best friends against your will, and seeing as me and aubrey would NEVER fight against each other willingly, she must have used her satanic powers on us, because before I knew what was going on, me and aubrey were batteling to the death.(Death written in dripping blood red letters) Aubrey sent a summersalt kickflip to my head, but luckily I ducked just before it hit. I rolled to the side of the hall and pulled out my personalized knife, then drove it into her stomach! Or so I thought. Aubrey turned out to be just as fast as I am and dodged the blow. Well, you can't fight very long in school before some bum teacher comes out to put an end to all your fun, and that's just what happened to us. We both froze as we heard a familiar melody playing..and we both turned around to find ourselves standing right outside room 307, which is also where the muisc was coming from. Then there was a blinding bright light. I squinted against the light and was able to make out Bo-Beefe and jesse sway running away in fear of..something. When the light finally died down enough for me to be able to see again, I looked up and saw the holiest of holy standing right infront of me and aubrey. I was so shocked, and I could feel erin keefe's evil spell breaking. Then I passed out. When I came to I found myself in the mole kings castle, and aubrey was sitting talking to one of his followers. I sat up and waited for my eyes to adjust to the extreme darkness that is..the mole king's hideout. Aubrey, upon noticing my awakening walked over and helped me stand up. Then we both happily walked to homeroom and were delighted to see that Bo-Beefe wasn't there. We could sit without fear this morning, thanks to our saviour..whose name I don't think I need to write...because it's too holy. THE END

Wed, 18 Feb 2004 01:00:47 GMT

Today: Danielle V.S. ME(I like how I'm all..in caps.)
Location: A big pit of CROSSFIRE...fire...
FIGHT!!
Danielle jumps down from a huge burning boulder and leaps upon my unsuspecting self(it sounds like I should say bad self but then I'd need a punchin'..from hannah) and kicks me right in the spine! I toppled forward and landed on a cockroach. ME:1 Cockroach:0 But back to the real fight...Well a little spine kick isn't enough to keep me down for long. So I hopped right back up and MEGA TOFU KICK PUNCHED,(which is some kind of awesome oriental move I learned from a drunken hobo claiming to be chinese taught me)her right square in the chest. It naturally sent her spine along with some rib bone flying across the burning landscape. Seeing as victory was clearly mine I sent her spiralling down to an even fiery..er..hell and yelled CROSSFIRE! As I watched danielle get caught up in it(maybe there should be a TM somewhere) Anyway, the final score? ME:2 Cockroach:0 Danielle:-500 and CROSSFIRE:let's just say we'll serve him pea soup. P.S. sorry that you've been reduced to second string jess g.

Fri, 13 Feb 2004 03:09:52 GMT

So tonight was the night of the valentine's day dance and boy was it awesome. I mean, me and jess g went, but not to socialize..oh no. We went to CRASH THAT LAME SHINDIG. So here's how it all went down. Because me and jess g are saving up our money to buy the vanilla ice cd we couldn't afford to waste any on a ticket..so we had to sneak in through the "back door" because we are rebels and all...like the rebel angels. Anyway, once we were inside, we decided to do what any normal party crasher would do, send our own personal attack hobo to annoy all the happy dancing peoples. It worked like a charm. There was chaos and people running everywhere..candy hearts flying into the sky like fireworks, and oh..it was great. Then for no reason we raided the bathrooms supply of toilet paper and tp'd the gym up right. Then we walked down to Dairy Queen and bought the hobo and ice cream for all his hard work, and then ran away real fast like while he was busy eating it because I'm pretty sure he had rabies. THE END
(Sorry jess g..I'm too lame to write anymore)

Fri, 30 Jan 2004 03:04:46 GMT

So today I beat up Jess G. in the area of refuge. Here's a little summary of what happend.
I was walking down the hall, twidlin' my thumbs and minding my own business when all of a sudden JESS G came up from behind me and kicked me in my liver, causing all my potential love to spill out onto the floor! Then she laughed in my face and told me that I had changed where my love was stored earlier on today to my kidneys..because they're funner to draw. I wasn't about to take that crap form her! So I jumped up into the air, spun around, and kicked her across the face. Then I picked up my trusting sword, which I keep in my back pocket, and stabed her in the large intestine. And as she lay on the convulsing in pain STUDENTS GATHERED AROUND HER TO LAUGH! and I laughed too. Then I began to walk away, but for dramatic effect I turned my head back around and said, "where's my chocolate milk?" Then I walked towards the setting sun, along with pofu's ghost and jessica turned out to be a fluffy pig.
THE END

liar

Wed, 28 Jan 2004 02:50:49 GMT

Yea..I don't see your messed up list jess g!